


I'll be Your Lois Lane (If You'll be My Superman)

by flibbertygigget



Series: The Other 51 [50]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Aaron just wants his comics please and thank you, Flirting, Gratuitous Comics Nerdery, Hercules is a smol bby nerd, James isn't paid enough to care about this shit, M/M, Mostly Marvel but some DC, Thomas Jefferson is a gatekeeping asshole, comic store au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-17
Packaged: 2018-08-09 07:32:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7792423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flibbertygigget/pseuds/flibbertygigget
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Thomas Jefferson is a gatekeeping asshole who works at a comics shop, Hercules Mulligan is a nerdy sex god, and Aaron Burr just wants to buy his comics, thanks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll be Your Lois Lane (If You'll be My Superman)

The tiny Monticello Comics Shop, crammed between a tattoo parlor and a gay bar, was not the type of place yuppies in suits tended to frequent. That was the reason why, when Aaron walked in and nervously began to hover by the trade paperbacks, the two employees in the shop stopped their intense discussion of who would win in a Professor X vs Kilgrave battle and openly stared at him.

"Is he seriously looking at the trade paperbacks?" Tom said, sounding almost disgusted. Aaron pretended not to hear him. "Is he going for _Watchmen_? I bet he's going for _Watchmen_. Baby's first comic is what that is."

"Be nice," said James, too bored to do anything more to stop his coworker. "Besides, _Watchmen_ is a classic."

"You're right," Tom said. " _All_ - _Star_ _Batman_ _and_ _Robin_ is what he's looking for. Hey, man, if you were really a geek you'd be buying real comics!"

"Oh, um, hello," Aaron said as though he had just noticed them and hadn't been listening to Tom's shittalking with rapidly heating ears. "I was just looking for a book a friend recommended. It's called _House_ _of_ _M_ , I think?" Tom rolled his eyes.

"Oh, sweetie, you don't want to get that," he said. "There's too much important continuity for you to grasp. To even begin comprehending that you'll have to read the Morrison run of _New X-Men_ up to issue 150, _Avengers Disassembled_ , _Excalibur_ Volume 3..." The bell on the door jangled as another man came in. When Tom saw who it was he instantly smiled. "Hercules! Come for your comics this month, I see."

"Yep," Hercules said. "Hey, did I hear you mention _Excalibur_ Volume 3?"

"Just a joke, man," Tom said. "So, hey, do you have any other series that you've been looking into?"

"Not yet," Hercules said. "At least not anything that's not from a tiny indie publisher that won't ship to you." Tom shrugged.

"Well, it was worth a shot," he said shamelessly. Aaron was still hovering nearby looking utterly confused by everything they were saying. Hercules noticed and turned to him.

"I haven't seen you around here before," he said.

"Oh, um, yeah," Aaron said. "I was just here to get one thing, really. My friend Theodosia suggested it to me. But then they were telling me that there's a bunch of backstory..?"

"That's comics, man," Hercules said. "Even the backstory has backstory."

"This guy here," said Tom, "was actually going to buy a trade paperback." Hercules' brow wrinkled in confusion. "He's a complete noob. He probably hasn't even read _Watchmen_."

"Weren't you just dissing _Watchmen_?" James said mildly. Tom waved him aside.

"Of course I wasn't dissing _Watchmen_. I was dissing the noobs that actually buy trade paperbacks. A true comics fan collects real comics."

"I don't know," Hercules said. "I know I have a lot of trades. It's an easy way to get more than one issue in a go, and you're actually supporting the creators and publishers, which you can't do after the initial run. Especially with something like _Watchmen_ , which is so incredibly dense and detailed, you'll want to have an easy way to go back and reference anything you missed on the first read." He turned to Aaron. "What were you trying to find, man?"

"It's called _House of M_ , I think," Aaron said. "But if I have to read like four things of backstory, I might go with something a bit less time-consuming."

"Four things of backstory?" Hercules said. He looked at Tom suspiciously. "Dude, all you really need is _Avengers Disassembled_ , which is easy enough to read on its own. Maybe track down the three trades of _Excalibur_ Volume 3 if you want to see what Xavier and Magneto were up to before shit went down in _House of M_." He grinned. "Plus, _Excalibur_ has one of my favorite mutants ever, Wicked. She can control ghosts, which is just awesome. Man, if I wasn't gay she'd be my girlfriend."

"If you weren't gay, you'd be shit at cosplay," Tom said. "Please, for all our sakes, stay gay as Gandalf."

"Hey, I'll have you know that my epic sewing skills are completely separate from my love of all things male," Hercules said, and then he turned back to Aaron. "Anyways, I think I have the trade paperback of _Avengers Disassembled_ at my place. You won't have to buy it then." Aaron smiled in relief.

"Thank you," he said. "Are you quite sure?"

"Oh, definitely. I'm always glad to be able to bring someone else over to the dark side." Hercules paused. "Hey, I didn't catch your name."

"Oh, I'm Aaron. Aaron Burr," Aaron said, awkwardly holding out his hand. Hercules took it bemusedly.

"Well, Aaron," he said. "Maybe once you're done with _Avengers Disassembled_ and _House of M_ , we can meet up for coffee and discuss them."

"Sure. I - I'd love that." From behind the counter, Tom made a gagging noise.

"Ugh, no wonder you defended trade paperbacks," he said. "You two already need to get a room."

**Author's Note:**

> Comics and Comics Terms in this self-indulgent mess:
> 
> Trade paperbacks are multiple issues of comic books compiled into one neat little package. Thomas Jefferson's disgust towards them is based on an actual conversation I had with a comic book store employee one time.
> 
> [Watchmen](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watchmen) is widely regarded as one of the best comics of all time, and is also a favorite of that one nihilist in your Philosophy 101 class.
> 
> [All-Star Batman and Robin](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_Star_Batman_%26_Robin,_the_Boy_Wonder) is an infamously terrible series by Frank Miller. The All-Star books were supposed to serve as introductions to the DC characters, but only the Superman series was any good and the line is more or less dead.
> 
> [House of M](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_of_M) was one of those Marvel mega-crossover events where Scarlet Witch went crazy and rewrote reality following the events of [Avengers Disassembled](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avengers_Disassembled). [Excalibur Volume 3](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Excalibur_\(comics\)#Excalibur_.28vol._3.2C_2004.29) served as a lead-in on the X-Men side of things, but I mostly recommend it not because of that but because it's honestly one of my favorite series ever. Hercules' obsession with [Wicked](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Marvel_Comics_characters:_W#Wicked) is second only to my own.


End file.
